I watched a movie that really challenged my thinking and way of living....

Last night I watched a movie that a friend recommended to me. It's called Faith Like Potatoes. It was such a powerful and inspiring movie about a farmer living in Africa whose life was completely falling apart, his marriage was suffering, his crops were dying, and he began to completely lose hope. When he was at his lowest he went to church with his family and decided to take a leap of faith and leave all his troubles at the foot of God and give control to Him. His new faith in God was the only thing he could hold onto to help him pull through. As soon as this happened everything seemed to fall more into place. Of course he still experienced huge obstacles but with the Lord by his side he pushed through. He began to preach about his faith to everyone he encountered. This film really pressed on my heart because this man was able to completely surrender everything so that he could receive all the gifts and blessings that God had set out for him. He didn't live and breathe a lukewarm, wishy-washy faith. I already have accepted Christ as my Savior yet I still am stuck in this in between area. I'm so tired of being pulled in both directions. Since when did I let the atmosphere that I live in control and direct the way that I live? Since when do I not stand up and be different? When did I put a basket over the light that God has lit in my heart? How can I be embarrassed of my faith, worried that people won't want to hang out with me? I've let myself get swept into this world of partying that has gone beyond the acceptable limit. I need to recenter myself. I hate this feeling. I don't like to look one direction and want to run towards it and forget the other one but then look back and see how appealing it looks. Anyway... Just had to get that off my chest.