Mallory's daily dedication to blogging helped me push myself to write more...

I'm sitting here, wrapped up in the comfiest clothes I own, including the new soft, cotton pink robe that my Aunt Sandy gave me for Christmas. I am waiting around for 30 minutes while these tiny strips across my teeth work their magic. Common I want a twinkling smile. That's the least I can ask for. If I can't look like a model at least I can have a damn bright smile, right? So at this moment I am feeling sort of... well downcast. I don't know why but I'm just kinda sad. I feel like the end of a sigh. That silence and stillness that isn't exactly peaceful, it's just there. Like the air is hanging suspended and I haven't quite taken a deep, life-giving, enlivening breath of it.

Today I went to work at Wells Fargo Advisors for the first time since summer. Ugh I"m not gonna lie, it was a drag but I'm thankful that I have a job that I can come home to so that I can make some money and catch up after the holidays. I was surprised at how much I remember about how to do things at work and how much I remember about all my mom's clients and their accounts, etc. The day actually went by sort of quickly too. It definitely could've been worse and I'm sure tomorrow will be the same.

New Years. I'm excited about the new year. I feel like I will be experiencing a transformation in it. Or... well I hope that I do. I'm looking to make some big changes in my life and I'm going to work my way back to the straight and narrow path that God had paved for my life. I'm tired of wandering in the dark forest that is full of twisted, mangled vines and crippled trees. I don't want to swat things out of my way constantly and have to slash through thick, dead branches to carve my own ridiculous path. It doesn't make any sense to do so anymore. "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Philippians 4:13

As for New Years plans... I have none at this moment. It's so weird because I feel like it's not just me who doesn't really have plans... it's like, everyone! I guess no one really cares about 2010. What a shame. I just hope I can find a fun way to celebrate with friends.

I saw Avatar in IMAX 3D for the second time tonight but this time I saw it with my family. We ran into our close family friends there and got to sit with them. It was a lot of fun and it was just as spectacular the second time around. I learned that it took 6 years to make, which is completely understandable if you think about how much detail was put into that film. It is truly incredible if you realize that almost everything you are watching isn't real and has been created using a computer. It also took 400 billion dollars to make. Outrageous... but if you think about how many people worked on the film and how long it took them to finish, it begins to look less like the exorbitant amount that it is.

Well I'm off to go read more of Dead Until Dark. Gotta love True Blood, baby <3

I watched a movie that really challenged my thinking and way of living....

Last night I watched a movie that a friend recommended to me. It's called Faith Like Potatoes. It was such a powerful and inspiring movie about a farmer living in Africa whose life was completely falling apart, his marriage was suffering, his crops were dying, and he began to completely lose hope. When he was at his lowest he went to church with his family and decided to take a leap of faith and leave all his troubles at the foot of God and give control to Him. His new faith in God was the only thing he could hold onto to help him pull through. As soon as this happened everything seemed to fall more into place. Of course he still experienced huge obstacles but with the Lord by his side he pushed through. He began to preach about his faith to everyone he encountered. This film really pressed on my heart because this man was able to completely surrender everything so that he could receive all the gifts and blessings that God had set out for him. He didn't live and breathe a lukewarm, wishy-washy faith. I already have accepted Christ as my Savior yet I still am stuck in this in between area. I'm so tired of being pulled in both directions. Since when did I let the atmosphere that I live in control and direct the way that I live? Since when do I not stand up and be different? When did I put a basket over the light that God has lit in my heart? How can I be embarrassed of my faith, worried that people won't want to hang out with me? I've let myself get swept into this world of partying that has gone beyond the acceptable limit. I need to recenter myself. I hate this feeling. I don't like to look one direction and want to run towards it and forget the other one but then look back and see how appealing it looks. Anyway... Just had to get that off my chest.

I had no motivation to do anything do anything except lay around in my pj's and eat...

Lucky Charms to be exact. That has been my food of choice lately. My mother picked up a box of it this week because it is Jason's favorite cereal. Oh and Jason is my cousin/brother. Definitely more of a brother than a cousin.

Yesterday was so much fun. I went with my mom, Craig, Jason, Aunt Janet and my Uncle Phil to downtown LA around 2:30. Well first we went to Universal Studios and took the metro from there to LA. Then we walked around downtown for a bit, which was eerily empty. Like literally... there were no people in LA yesterday. I guess they were all sleeping off their wild Christmas days. After walking for a bit and checking things out we decided to stop at Casey's Irish Pub where we had a snack of delicious french fries and drinks. My mom and and my Uncle Phil ordered their famous Irish Coffee and dang was it strong and super delicious. Then we went on to look inside the Millennium Biltmore, a gooorgeous hotel in downtown LA. They were setting up for this giant wedding, it was so beautiful. Our third destination was the Westin Bonaventure, another spectacular hotel which has an awesome revolving lounge on the 35th floor. We rode the elevators up and down to look out over the skyline. It was actually kinda fun too because the elevators moves so fast, it's almost like a ride. After this we continued walking around the city till we were across the street from the Center Theater Group which houses the Ahmanson Theater, the Mark Taper Forum, and the Kirk Douglas Theater. We decided to look for a place to have dinner and ended up just grabbing some sub sandwiches at Subway. I got to spend some quality time talking about life with my cousin Jason. He's so great and I'm sad that I don't get to see him as much anymore. After dinner we walked over to the theater and still had an hour and a half before the show was going to start so we grabbed tea and coffee and dessert at the cafe outside, which was lovely. Thennnnn MARY POPPINS! Seriously probably the most incredible show/musical I've ever seen. It was magical and the stars were so talented. Even the children had strong voices, acting ability and even dancing ability. Dear Matthew Bourne, never stop choreographing! I just can't even put into words how great this show was. My jaw was dropped for over half of it.

Well I'm looking at the clock and it is 12:45. I better start doing something with this day or it will slip through my fingers as usual. Sorry about the long post!

That I HATED cleaning up the kitchen with a fiery passion...

Seriously though. My mom, bless her heart, makes delicious food for large quantities of people and then for some reason I always am asked to pick up my high school cleaning responsibility of cleaning up the kitchen. This task is legitimately my least favorite thing to do EVER. I hate it. And I'm also not good at it. The old food that I have to wash off the plate grosses me out so much that I have to hold whatever I'm rinsing off by it's edge and then make sure that the very hot water washes everything off it for me. Also I have to do it with hot water because cold water + old crusty food = vomit. It gives me the heebie jeebies. So now I am currently watching my lovely sister Shauna and my mother cleaning while I sit here like a wasteful lump of life. I should really go help. Ok ok I will in a minute but right now I am so enjoying life. I am listening to the beautiful voices of Azure Ray on my new 160GB iPod classic that my parents got me for Christmas. I am so blessed. I have such a wonderful family and I'm so lucky to get any gifts at all for Christmas. You know what? I'm lucky to even have shelter to come home to for the Holidays. God has blessed me with so much and yet I catch myself so often complaining or griping about silly little things in life, like dirty dishes. Ugh I should kick myself haha. BRB I'm gonna go get a pick of paper, write KICK ME on it and then stick it on my back. Haha. Anyway I hope you all have the most wonderful Christmas ever. Cherish your families! Count your blessings and make sure you catch yourself if you start to become a Grinch or a Ebeneezer like me ;) I'm so happy right now and I'm going to go joyfully wash dishes with my amazing family. Remember that Jesus is the reason for the season!

<3

It was Christmas and I wished everyone the merriest day ever...

If I was at my younger, imaginative age of 5, my current awake state would be utterly unacceptable! Santa could be coming down the chimney at any moment! Oh to be child-like, naive, and innocent again. I remember baking cookies for Santa, acting out the Christmas story with my childhood best friend Paula, baking a cake for Jesus's birthday. I miss these things so much now that I'm older. But we did keep up our annual tradition this year by going to Candlelight service. It was beautiful as always. My favorite part is at the end when we sing Silent Light and everyone begins to light their candles one by one until the whole room is lit by only those tiny flickers.

Today has been SO great. Woke up and ate a delicious bowl of Lucky Charms, which was quite a delight since for the past week I've been consuming wholesome bowls of Raisin Bran. Blah. Then I got dressed, wrapped presents, helped set up for our delicious lunch/dinner-ish meal of ribs, corn on the cob and mashed potatoes. Oh man it was so tasty and SO filling. Then we hung out for a while as a family and chilled on the couch watching a movie before the SMU Hawaii Bowl game. And then... of course the greatest SMU game in history!! Or at least in my mind :) Our 1st Bowl game in 25 years! We kicked SO much ass today. I'm so ridiculously proud to call myself a Mustang and to sing our alma mater. I couldn't have been more excited and beaming while watching the game today. Especially since I have friends who are cheerleaders and players on the team and I also got to see a few of my friends in the crowds. I loved every moment of it. Then after that we went to Candlelight service at Bel Air which I mentioned earlier.

I'm so excited for the morning and just thought I had to blog about what has happened today. Also I must mention that I absolutely adore my roommates. I don't know if they are reading but seriously they are the best. They are my best friends who I tell everything to and they guaranteed can make me laugh at any moment of the day. I'm so lucky to have them. I've never ever had a group of girls and friends that I've been this tight with and it feels so nice to have them to come home to everyday at SMU. They are my sisters, they are my friends, they are my life! QUAD LOVE FOREVER ;) Haha. Haters can suck it.

Good night everyone! Merry Christmas. Don't forget about the true meaning of Christmas: Christ is born and He came to the earth to save us from our sins. Luke 2: 1-20Remember that it's so much more rewarding to give than to receive. And lastly cherish the time you get to spend with your family. It's precious.

<3

I was so lazy that I stayed in my pj's till 4pm

I feel a pang of guilt in recognizing this truth. However, not enough for me to actually get my ass off the couch. I'm sitting here watching episode after episode of America's Next Top Model. There are so many productive things that I could be doing with my life. Unpacking... wrapping presents... helping my mom out... doing SOMETHING. But here I am. Sitting around in my tie-dye shirt, Stewie pants, and gray jacket. All I have to say is that I would give ANYTHING to be a model. To be tall enough, skinny enough, beautiful enough. Oh gosh it's my secret dream. I would love to have makeup artists and hairstyles and fashion people make me look amazing. Lights, camera, action. Spectacular.

Last night was so fun. I went with my mom and Aunt Janet to our family friend's house. Then after that I went to a friend's welcome home party. He came back from studying abroad in London and had lots fun stories to tell. Alright well I'm gonna go help my mama make her famous homemade lasagna. YUM!

I didn't want to write a long post....

I sit here. 2:39am. I take a deep breath of stale air. I glance around the room. And I think. But not nearly like I used to. I wish that I could be in a place of constant reflection, observation, and focus. Where my thoughts have purpose and conviction. But I sit here... inhale... exhale... stagnant... passionless... opinionless... stuck. Maybe that's not true but it's kind of how it feels.

Seek truth, Michelle. Strive to attain all things that are good. Pray, believe, dream, and most importantly achieve. Don't let laziness or complacency stifle you. Take steps, move forward. Don't sit and play in the dirt when you can go out and grow an orchard with it. Have faith in yourself and in God. He has a plan for you so run towards it.

I was really enjoying being at home and LOVING the Christmas spirit...

Christmas. I love everything about it. The lights, the music, the decorations, the spirit, the flavors, the traditions, family, candles, the warmth. It's beautiful. Tonight I went with my family and some friends to Candy Cane Lane which is conveniently located around the corner from my house. Despite the reduction in houses that were decorated due to the economy, it was still so nice and so much fun to see. It's traditions like these, those unwritten ones, that I love so much.

Today I did my Christmas shopping, err well most of it. I still have a few places to go tomorrow but it feels good to get most of it out of the way. Yesterday I felt guilty about relaxing because I felt like I was supposed to be shopping. I then attempted and failed, miserably but went back today and was far more successful. It was strange because my reluctance to do my Christmas shopping felt reminiscent of me putting off writing a paper or another assignment of the same sort. I felt like there was homework for me to do, but, instead, I was just sitting around watching movies and being lazy. But now I feel accomplished. However, I still have to wrap everything but that's another story...

I'm going to see Avatar tonight in IMAX 3D. WOOOO! It's gonna be sick. Oh and another random update... today was the day of Michelle eating and drinking the things she loves that aren't available for consumption in the great state of Texas... aka Coffee Bean and In-N-Out. So glorious. Oh so my mom's friend came over and after my mother, being her typical self, showed off all my drawings from this semester, told us that she wanted a copy of my grocery store final drawing (aka Aunt Jemima and Bisquick). This makes me feel like the semester was a success :)

Alright well I'm going to go chill out of the couch for a while till I get picked up to go see the movie. Toodles!

I kept putting off blogging and then began to become overwhelmed by all the things I haven't blogged about...

Ok so it has been WAY too long since I last updated and I want to discuss many things but I don't want to make this post a novel. I don't want my readers, if there are any out there, to feel like my blog is homework. Plus it's Winter Break. Where you celebrate not having to think about anything scholarly or academic. So at this moment I am watching House on our new amazing 42 inch flat screen Samsung HDTV. It's incredible. So life-like that it looks almost weird. Anyway, I'm kind abored right now. I have nothing to do and I don't have a car to ride around in, unfortunately. Alright so let's go over the last week of school, finals, parties, etc. Well everyone decided that they were going to turn 21 on the same weekend which happened to be the weekend before finals. I had my performance, which I forgot to blog about. Basically I got extremely nervous and well I got through it without the audience knowing the I completely jumbled and mixed up all the lines and aside from my inability to handle my props or timing and some lighting problems it was fairly successful. Everyone said it was very powerful and moving and apparently I made the whole room tear up. The next day I got my take home final for Business Law and me and my group finished it that night so that after that I had an entire week before my next final which meant what..... Oh yeah, party time and complete procrastination. So this is on to the weekend of 21st birthdays. It was just a wild time full of dance offs and Bad Girls Club and Truth or Dare and so much more. Details not required hahaha. But then I had a rough week of finals. So many hours of art haha. But I pulled through and ended up getting much better grades than I thought I was going to get. But there was a ridiculous situation with my Solo Performance grade. I don't even want to get into it. Ugh. So now I'm home and am just completely relaxing and kicking it with friends. I'm so excited to not have to think about school whatsoever for 5 weeks. So great. Alright well I'm going to get back to watching TV. Devil Wears Prada is on. :)

I was trying to memorize my performance and it made me feel ill...

I'm considering possibly changing the name of the blog to "Wow, all I think about or talk about is Solo Performance."

However, that would be silly since I'm performing it on Monday and therefore will not longer have to rant, complain, worry about it in such a short wile. I just have to crank up my memorization skills now and really put my heart and soul in the stories that I tell and the scenes I act out. I'm sure that as soon as I get in front of the audience I will come to life. While trying to practice, it's impossible for me to really act it out especially when there are 2 or 3 people around. I'm excited to do this though. I've put so much work into it. So much that I'm worried that maybe I've spent too much time prepared and not enough time practicing. Oh well... I'll just say a prayer, take a deep breath, relax and do my thing.

So I just got back from the Angelika theater where I saw An Education with 1/2 of the quad and Staci. It was a great movie. Some very questionable scenes and strange portions of the plot but I would definitely recommend it.

Alright well I can't spend any more time sitting here on the couch. I must make my way over to Meadows to rehearse with Nick Cains who is a complete angel. He is my "buddy" in the class (All of us non-theater majors got to paired with theater majors to help us prepare for our performances, thank the good Lord). He's an angel.

Goodnight everyone! I'm so excited about tomorrow. I have so many things to look forward to.

I woke up, opened the door and the magic of snow flakes gently falling made me ecstatic....

Let it snowww, let it snoww, let it snooooowwww! How could the day start out better? Oh yeah, that's right, it couldn't. I opened the door, my jaw dropped, and a huge smile lit up my face. It was like a magical winter wonderland. Sitting with my besties in front of one of the big windows in the dining room enjoying our front row seats of the spectacle and munching on cereal was the perfect way to begin my day.

At this moment I am in Managerial Accounting clearly paying close attention to what is being taught in this riveting lecture. I really should be paying attention though. About 10 minutes ago I had to get up, leave class, go downstairs and get myself a delicious LARGE cup of Einstein's Hazelnut/Vanilla coffee because I was literally incapable of keeping my eyes open. The weight of my eyelids was more than I could bear. Now I am feeling much more alert. Dear God, thank you so much for coffee. Alright now I'm on to my next class. Toodle-loo!!